The Importance of Kindness in Our Life

Article in brief: the author discusses the importance of kindness.

 Artwork by Hayat AlHassan (@HayatAlH)
Artwork by Hayat AlHassan (@HayatAlH)

It is quite possible that not all cunning people can be labeled as intelligent. In certain books, it is taught that one of the ways to get into a person’s heart (not necessarily in the romantic sense) is to buy them gifts. This is not exactly a skill that needs to be acquired. Anyone can do this. There is also another sly act where people use sweet words and their natural charisma for a negative advantage. But like most things, the reasons for why we do them hold the true meaning and determine the final outcome. I personally, like many, am a big believer that our intentions determine who we are.

Instead of focusing on a person’s words or actions, I prefer to look at their intentions. Perhaps their heart was in the right place but are not necessarily gifted at executing what they had planned or simply didn’t know how to word it appropriately. No matter what kind of hardship, testing times or illnesses we might face, people will not care if we are not good to them.

“Kindness is more important than wisdom, and the recognition of this is the beginning of wisdom.” –Theodore Ruebin

So these less intelligent but cunning people who sometimes win the love of certain people – they do it of course by pressing the right buttons, the buttons of emotion.

Even though this is absolutely wrong, it just goes to show what a powerful tool kindness (or false kindness) can be. Although their overall knowledge might not be high to say the least, in this particular matter they have this gift. Of course they will not escape the instinct of truly intelligent people.

“You can fool all the people some of the time, and some of the people all the time, but you cannot fool all the people all the time.” –Abraham

Lincoln. Real kindness (yes, real kindness) is always a choice. It comes with humility as well as confidence. There is an imitation of kindness as well; it is arrogance that has a top layer coated very thinly with a mere imitation of kindness to throw people off. And unfortunately, in most cases it works. Again, I say, this is how powerful the act of kindness is.

Why did I say kindness is a choice? So that I could describe the arrogant type of “kindness”? Surely not. This is why I mentioned humility. Sometimes fear or intimidation comes in the form of kindness‎. This is mostly when it’s mistaken for weakness. But it’s not really a mistake is it?

Real kindness has no negative pride. We must be good to one another. We must be kind. We must understand, apologize, forgive and most importantly learn. Like many others, I promise myself to see things as they are, leaving emotion and personal feeling out of the equation as much as humanly possible, as much as my own mind will allow me to. I also deeply believe in the reasons for why things are done. Like other great qualities, kindness too needs to be applied for the right reason.

There are very few truths out there. People lie to themselves all the time. They replay a conversation and rewrite it a dozen times over just to satisfy their ego. A guy can say he was being honest and kind with a girl but in reality he was thinking of his own physical need. A girl can say she’s spreading positivity by smiling at people but in reality just enjoying being chased by guys. A man or woman can say they’re being nice to someone but in reality they just want something from them or are possibly intimidated by them. It’s a thin line, but real kindness is a truth. And like most good things, it expects nothing in return.

“Three things cannot remain long hidden. The sun, the moon, and the truth” –Buddha.

It’s important to be kind to people, not because of who they are, but because of who we are and who we want to continue becoming. It is also important to be kind to ourselves, to give ourselves what our heart needs, to listen to our inner thoughts, to not speak to our own selves in a negative or condescending way, to believe in ourselves and help ourselves up again.

“When dealing with people, remember you are not dealing with creatures of logic, but creatures of emotion.” -Dale Carnegie

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